Before going any further just let me say that I do not think that the thoughts below in any way encourage us to be door mats. Not at all. If we are in the right relationship none of this should be a problem. Below is a repost from The Gentle Home blog by Brittany.
The Journey to Reclaim Godly Femininity Part I
We have lost so much.
I write this with a burden on my heart to reclaim something I didn’t know I was missing… until now.
I’ve been reading lately scriptures that paint a portrait of how Godly women ought to conduct themselves in speech, dress and actions. It is so much more than how we present ourselves physically (although that is important and I will share my thoughts about that later). One very beautiful description of a Godly woman is found in 1 Peter 3: 3-4:
“Do not let your adornment be merely outward, arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel- rather let it be the hidden person of the heart with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.”
Portrayed here is just one lovely example of Godly femininity. She does not draw attention to herself by wearing overly fancy and expensive clothing; she is humble. She knows her true self is hidden within her (and not determined by how she looks), so she does not strive to make herself known but waits to be sought. She does not get upset when others misjudge her but has a soft and quiet way about her. Her confident beauty radiates from within, making her shine bright.
As I sit back and imagine such a beautiful creature, I am immediately convicted of my own shortcomings in my marriage, speech and conduct. But at the same time, I am inspired and uplifted by this image, filled with hope and invited to draw closer to understand and become all I was created to be.
Thinking about Godly femininity, one of the first things I asked God was, “Why is femininity so important anyway?” Especially in this world where women are encouraged to do anything a man can do. The verse that I thought about goes back to the beginning, back to Genesis where God said,
“Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness…So God created man in His own image; in the image of God he created him; male and female He created them.” Genesis 1:26-27 (emphasis mine)
God could have made everyone the same, but He didn’t. In His beauty He made them male and female; He made them different. (Thanks to Above Rubies for providing this insight). And in making them male and female, God chose to reveal something of His heart and His character to the world. In man, God reveals his warrior quality, His heart of action, strength and provision, and in woman God reveals His tenderness, compassion, beauty and intimacy with His beloved creation. (Isaiah 42:13-14) Oh, just to meditate on this would be enough! God is exceedingly beautiful, deep and mysterious. He is constantly, yes, lavishly pouring Himself out for us, if only we would take notice.
Two tremendously important aspects of femininity are bearing children and breastfeeding. It is something only a woman can do, and God meant for it to be that way. His design will never change. When we go to put our baby to our breast to comfort and sustain her, we tell our children and others “God wants to comfort you, He wants to sustain you with Himself.” (Isaiah 49:14-15) Each time we conceive life and nourish it within our bodies we tell the world, “God is in the business of giving life and desires to give you new life through Himself.” Just as a baby lives and moves and has its being inside its mother, so this verse describes us as we are in Him:
“For in Him we live and move and have our being, as also some of your own poets have said, ‘For we are also His offspring.’ “
I believe the Adversary, the devil, strives eagerly to stamp out this revelation of God’s tender compassion and care by trying to deceive us into believing that femininity is not very important and we’d do well to live our lives in search of something more fulfilling. But dear women, we have been fed a great lie! As I look at the people around me and the “pattern of this world,” it becomes clear to me that the devil, in many ways, is successfully extinguishing the beautiful, inviting, comforting light of femininity that God revealed through woman.
As women who want to embrace the call of God on our lives, who want to live deep in the design of our Maker, who want embrace with a whole and cheerful heart our feminine heart and body that were given to us- what do we do now? How do we get back to this place where being feminine is a good thing? What I know for sure is that we must renew our minds.
“And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is good and acceptable and perfect will of God.” (emphasis mine)
Did you catch that? All around us as women we are being told by the world and others what is good, what is nice, what we should live our lives for, what’s important. We are told that you really shouldn’t have too many babies because they are a financial and physical burden. We are told that in order to look attractive we need to wear the latest styles and fashions. We are told aging is bad thing and to be avoided as best we can. We are told that what all men care about is sex and we should display our sexuality in order to attract the man that we want. We are told submission to our husbands is outdated and ridiculous. We are told most of the Bible is ancient text and not meant for our day to day living in this modern world. We are told that God is still waiting for us to get our act together. We are told you will be beautiful if… And then we even have our own thoughts on matters, our own opinions and perceptions, misguided and based on past experiences and lies of the Enemy. So how can we ever really know the beautiful plan that our adoring Maker made for us?
“But be transformed by the renewing of your mind…”
This, dear sisters, is of utmost importance in reclaiming our Godly femininity. God made you. He knows you and loves you, deeply though you’ve made mistakes and had a rebellious heart. He couldn’t stand to be apart from you, so He sent His Son into the world, through a woman and she gave birth to a little baby boy, Jesus. He took your punishment for your mistakes and rebellious heart on Himself and died on a cross to win you back for His own, not so we could continue living in fear that God wants to punish us… no, but to live with Him in right relationship to be all we should have been before the fall of man, to be all we are meant to be now, and to enjoy the fellowship of our Creator.
“…You have also become dead to the law through the body of Christ, that you may be married to another- to Him who was raised from the dead, that we should bear fruit to God.”
Is that not the most beautiful picture of God calling our feminine hearts to Himself? I have caught a beautiful shimmering glimpse of who I was really made to be as a woman, and it is taking my breath away. I pray this post will draw you closer to the heart of God, not to the God you think you know, but to the real heart of God. To the only One that can satisfy our feminine hearts. I pray you seek eagerly God’s word on matters such as femininity, being a wife and bearing children. I pray you will find what your precious feminine heart has always been searching for.
I also don’t think we need to hide under big baggy clothes and wear dresses to our ankles with ugly black stockings and shoes. We don’t need to show as much as some often do but we don’t need to dress like an Amish person either, unless we are one.